Street Fighter IV ticks me off!

Disclaimer: The following rant is purely the opinion of me (Brad Mosbacher) and is not reflective in any way of the opinions of Jeff Rivera, anyone else affiliated with Stupid Gamer, or the millions of SFIV fans that will maul me when they find out I posted this little rant. Now it’s time for me to rage.

This story starts out fairly innocently. I was at Target yesterday, to purchase some necessities that were long overdue for me (clothes, pillow, new shoes and the like) , so i decide while I was there that I would go ahead and purchase Star Ocean: The Last Hope for 360. But those hopes were dashed on some rather sharp rocks when they didn’t even have a slot open on their shelf for the game. So I wander about the store for a while more, picking up various items and  just looking around before coming back to look at games again. This time I notice they have Street Fighter IV in stock and I decide on a whim that I was going to buy the game, even though I know next to nothing about it, aside from what was told to me by word of mouth. I end up purchasing the game and then I check out and leave. Fast Forward to 11:30 PM: I pop the game into the 360 and install it to the hard drive, then fire it up, not knowing what to expect. I enter the game, go into options and set the difficulty to easy, then I enter arcade mode. I pick the character I want to play as, which was Ryu, and start a match, then the game does something unexpected. It comes right at me like a seasoned  pro gamer and completely annhilates me, again and again. So I pick a new character, Chun Li this time. I manage to win a couple times and was starting to feel pretty darn good about myself when it happens again. The AI goes into kill mode and wipes its electronic ass with me. Needless to say I am absolutely and totally pissed off right now, simply because of the cheapness and overpowering nature of the game’s AI, even on the easiest difficulty.  As it is now, it is absolutely impossible for me to learn how to play this game even if I wanted to (yes I know there is a training mode, but I dont like those modes). Long story short I think I made the biggest mistake of my life buying Street Fighter IV and I will probably never bother with the series again.

The Stupid Gamer Podcast #32 – I hate Skype

Well, we recorded a show, and it was actually pretty good, but it looks like technical issues are going to kill this one. Upon started the post production, I found that there were some recording issues that couldn’t be resolved in the post process. Should I ever get this to sound at least presentable, I may release it as a sort of lost episode. For now, you’ll just have to wait until later this week when we record again.

kirk

Sorry, everybody…

Forbes: Rock Band is a shameless knockoff

Yeah, that’s a direct quote. In a recent article where Forbes did a profile on Bobby Kotick, the big boss of Activision, they take a random shot at EA/MTV Games/Harmonix in an attempt to continue their pumping up of Bobby. Here’s the direct quote:

EA also teamed with MTV to sell Rock Band, a shameless knockoff of Guitar Hero that added drums, bass and a microphone to the world of make-believe rock stars.

Now, we’ve had issues with Forbes in the past where they’ve either tired to capitalize on a hot topic in gaming or to stir up controversy for hits, but this one just smacks of ignornace. First of all, Harmonix created Guitar Hero, so it would be hard for them to “knockoff” their own creation. Secondly, Rock Band took a concept that was growing stagnant and evolved it into something much bigger and much more exciting. If anything, Guitar Hero: World Tour is a “shameless knockoff” of Rock Band, but we’re not about to go there right now. Oh, and for the record Forbes, Activision isn’t the most successful publisher in videogames today, that title belongs to Nintendo. Fact checking, folks.

Link to the original story (quote on page 3): http://www.forbes.com/forbes/2009/0202/052.html 

Mainstream media (Time) still hasn’t figured it out

STOP COVERING VIDEO GAMES, YOU LOOK STUPID!

Ahem.

So each year publications like Time, Newsweek, The New York Times, and all the other “mainstream” news companies try to put together top ten lists or best of awards for video games. Occasionally they get a few games right on their lists, but they usually just show why they need to stick to politics or the environment. Here’s what Time put out as their top ten list.

1. Grand Theft Auto IV (360, PS3, PC)
2. Braid (360)
3. LittleBigPlanet (PS3)
4. Rock Band 2 (360, PS3)
5. Gears of War 2 (360)
6. Dead Space (360, PS3, PC)
7. Star Wars: The Force Unleashed (Wii, 360, PS3, DS, PSP)
8. Hunted Forever (free Flash)
9. Fieldrunners (iPhone)
10. Spore (PC)

This is just stupid. No, it’s not just a matter of dissenting opinion, it’s a matter of stupidity. How do you leave games like Fallout 3, Metal Gear Solid 4, Left 4 Dead, Burnout Paradise, Ninja Gaiden II, Fable II, Mario Kart Wii, and Super Smash Bros Brawl when you’ve got garbage like The Force Unleashed, Hunted Forever (not that great, try it), Fieldrunners (don’t bother), and Grand Theft Auto IV (formulaic garbage) on there? I know that would make for a bigger list than ten, but I’m just offering up some possible and more worthy replacements. Last year Time put Halo 3 at number one, another title definitely not deserving of the top spot.

We go through this every year, mainstream media, stop putting out your top game lists.

Link to the atrocity: http://www.time.com/time/specials/2008/top10/article/0,30583,1855948_1863763_1863769,00.html

 

Edit: More proof of their general idiocy…here are their top ten movies (Speed Racer is in, The Dark Knight isn’t. lol wut)


1. WALL-E
2. Synecdoche, New York
3. My Winnipeg
4. 4 Months, 3 Weeks & 2 Days
5. Milk
6. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
7. Slumdog Millionaire
8. Iron Man
9. Speed Racer
10. Encounters at the End of the World.

Ladies and gentleman, the worst gaming article of 2008

Now, Cracked.com isn’t known for its journalistic integrity, but when you’re going to make a list, submit it to Digg, and then sit back and smugly admire your wares, you should at least make an attempt to be accurate. Cracked posted their list of “The 6 Most Retarded Gaming Consoles Ever Released”, and it included such undeserving nominees as the Fairchild, the Vectrex, the Odyssey, and the TG-16. I might agree with the inclusion of the Nomad and the Epoch, but they’re still a push to get in there.

Now sure, this is probably just an article that’s 50% traffic bait, so they have to be a little controversial, but how do such stinkers like the CD-i, 3DO, 32X, or the Pippin manage to keep themselves off the list? It’s downright shameful of them to put out some of the consoles they did on that list.

Hey Cracked, go back to making fun of Hollywood. You’re just a poor man’s Mad Magazine anyway.

Devs getting desperate to curb secondhand game sales

Ok, this is getting ridiculous. I love Epic games as much as anybody else, but it seems that a lot of sketchy comments leak out from those guys. In a recent interview with Game Informer, head of Epic, Mike Capps discussed the need to “make strides against the secondhand market.” Now, I understand where Mike is coming from, but only to a small degree. Here are a few more of his quotes, and then I’ll give my two cents on the matter.

I think DLC will be increasing in scope just because in the US we really need to make strides against the second-hand market[…]

The secondary market is a huge issue in the United States. Our primary retailer makes the majority of its money off of secondary sales, and so you’re starting to see games taking proactive steps toward that by… if you buy the retail version you get the unlock code[…]

I’ve talked to some developers who are saying ‘If you want to fight the final boss you go online and pay USD 20, but if you bought the retail version you got it for free’. We don’t make any money when someone rents it, and we don’t make any money when someone buys it used – way more than twice as many people played Gears than bought it.

Ok, I really do get why developers dislike the secondhand market. No, they don’t get a penny when Gamestop sells you a used copy of Gears of War 2 a week from now for $55.00, but when someone traded in that game, they probably put their money toward a new game purchase anyway. The used game market is giving lots of gamers extra cash to spend on new games. I know plenty of people, myself included, that need to sell off older games on Amazon, eBay, or in a Gamestop to be able to pick up new titles. If you take away the secondhand market, you probably pull millions of dollars out of the buying pool. It’s a simple concept. What do you do when you want a new car? You sell your old one. Need a new home? Well, you better sell the old one, huh? With luxury items you can’t cut off a funding stream or else the industry will bottleneck.

Sorry Epic, you’re living in a free market and you’re doing JUST FINE. Nobody feels sorry for you, and nobody should.

No podcast tonight.

Sorry guys, Jeff is at the EA Black Box event right now and I am unable recruit a co-host to replace him, so the podcast will not happen tonight. But fear not, for I remain committed to bringing you fine people a podcast once every week. So instead of just cancelling the podcast it is delayed till Wednesday so you can either expect it that night or Thursday morning, depending on how Jeff feels. Once again I am sorry for the delay.

Ridiculous oversensitivity delays LittleBigPlanet

SCEE announced today that LittleBigPlanet is being delayed so that they can recall each and every disc that has been pressed and sent to retail for sale. Yes, every disc is being recalled so that they can press new ones that will eliminate a sound track is only 2 seconds ong on 2 different occasions in a barely audible foreign language. So why the fuss? Well, apparently that little snippet contains “two expressions that can be found in the Qur’an” according to SCEE. Media Molecule prepared a patch that would have fixed the issue, but Sony is opting for a full recall so that those with limited or no Internet connectivity won’t be subject to such vile and dangerous behavior.

Kratos Sackboy is not happy.

Honestly, this is just stupid. The track itself was recorded by a Muslim artist, so I highly doubt it’s offensive in the least. I try to be as sensitive and tolerant as possible, but there are just times when people decide that making a fuss is their sole calling in life. This whole thing is stupid and anybody that thinks that delaying the game is warranted is either an oversensitive ninny or just plain idiotic. Whistle blowers, get a life.