The Stupid Gamer

I’m giddy like a kid in a candy store with a fistful of money. One of my favorite games from the GameCube and Dreamcast is making its way to Xbox Live Arcade tomorrow. Ikragua, developed by Treasure, is one of the most addictive and challenging shooters of all time. The game introduced a very unique combo system that begs the gamer to play the game endlessly as there’s always improvements to be made on each level. It’s been since Pac-Man: Championship Edition that we’ve seen a game so perfectly suited to the Xbox Live Arcade environment.

Now might be the right time to get one of those custom arcade sticks for your 360, huh? I know I’m going to either build my own or start pricing them. With stuff like Pac-Man: CE, Ikaruga, Street Fighter II, and others on the service, it’s probably time to ditch that piece of crap d-pad and analog stick found on the 360 controller.

Back in the early 90s, my cousin and I used to ride our bikes to this Fred Meyer department store in Bountiful, Utah each Saturday. We did so to check out the new comics and to play the 7-8 arcade games that they had in a small room up front. The games would rotate, but the regulars included TMNT, Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter II, and Spy Hunter. Each Saturday for years I’d play that Spy Hunter at least once, until the store remodeled and the arcades were removed. As a kid, I was crushed.

Fast forward to 2008 and the wife and I decide to go camping down in Southern Utah to some sand dunes. Just before leaving I did my daily check on eBay, craigslist, and local ads for a Spy Hunter. BAM! There was one in Las Vegas and the auction was to end Saturday night. I contacted the seller and asked if I could pick it up if I won on Sunday, he said yes. I threw in a token bid, and we went camping.

Sunday morning we got up early, broke down camp, and made our way to St. George, Utah where we got some breakfast and I found a computer I could use in a hotel lobby. I checked eBay and…YES! I won! We started down for Vegas when the seller called and told me the directions to his house and that he’d be there all day.

We got there, crammed the machine in the back of my parent’s Yukon and rearranged all the camping supplies (and our dog) and made it all fit. Just wanting to get home, we drove the long drive back home, which is just north of Salt Lake City, Utah.

Last night as I was going over the machine, I found something really odd: a sticker from Classy Chassis Beauty Supply. This sticker came from a store that’s local to Bountiful, Utah (I googled it, it’s the only one)…and is only about 1/2 a mile away from Fred Meyer! I had somehow found my childhood Spy Hunter. I couldn’t believe it.

The machine needs some work to fix a broken trigger button, and it needs a good cleaning up, but knowing where it came from and where it’s been, I’m never letting this one go. Here’s a picture of the machine, before I get to restoring it, and before I get it down into the arcade room.

Go and get it! Despite rumors and hinting released by Activision that the new maps would be released next week, Infinity Ward has managed to get the new Call of Duty 4 map pack out on XBLM for 800 Microsoft Points.

I’ve been pretty excited about the release of these maps. In fact, I’ve been looking forward to these maps just as much as I look forward to a game release. I’ll be out of town over the weekend, but you can bet that I’ll be all over these new maps when I’m back home.

Giant enemy crabs seem to have fused with the Pringles Man in EverQuest 2. Don’t believe me? Well, try to deny the evidence you see below:

Here we have your typical every day crab. He looks nice and completely docile. What happens, however, when you combine him with this?

The Pringles Man. One of the surliest fellows you’ll ever have the displeasure of coming across.

Here is the end result!

It’s pretty obvious what’s going on here. We’re onto you, Sony.

Arcade collectors are a funny breed. Wherever there is room, we think we have space to cram another cabinet. It doesn’t matter if it’s in mint condition, in need of some repairs, or if it’s a total project machine…we’ll find somewhere to keep it until we have it fully restored and ready for placement in our arcade rooms or for sale.

My wife was very patient with me while we were living in our condo and despite having a garage, we both were scraping ice off of our cars each morning during the winter or getting heat blasted each time we opened a car door. Since we didn’t have room in the house, my cabinet projects owned the garage. However, my obsession pales in comparison with some of the dedicated arcade collectors that shared the pictures you’ll see below. Many of these pictures are of living rooms, bedrooms, and even bathrooms of your typical house. I imagine there are either some angry or very patient wives out there…maybe both.

So do you any of you out there have games stuffed in corners, behind doors, or next to your bed? If so, email them to me at jar155 [at] gmail.com and I’ll add them in or include them in future posts.

C’mon, EA! This is ridiculous. In an official press release EA Sports announced the ship date and price for Madden 2009. Here are some cuts from the release (we’ll whine after the quotes):

Madden NFL 09 will be available in retail stores in North America on August 12, including a special collector’s edition in celebration of the 20th anniversary of one of the best-selling video games franchises of all time. The Madden NFL 09 20th Anniversary Collector’s Edition will be the ultimate interactive NFL experience - featuring full versions of both Madden NFL 09 and the all-new NFL Head Coach 09, exclusive classic Madden NFL gameplay, and an extensive library of bonus video content.

Additionally, gamers will be able to import their user-designed plays from NFL Head Coach 09 and put them into Madden NFL 09 to create customized playbooks for complete control on the field.

Madden NFL 09 will be available for the Xbox 360™ video game system from Microsoft, PlayStation®2 and PLAYSTATION®3 computer entertainment systems, Wii™, Nintendo DS™, PSP™ (PlayStation®Portable) handheld entertainment system and is rated RP by the ESRB. At a suggested retail price of $89.99, Madden NFL 09 20th Anniversary Collector’s Edition will be available for the Xbox 360™ and PLAYSTATION®3.

So let’s look at this. The standard price for a collector’s edition this generation as been $70, a price that already feels way too high…so EA feels that somehow $90 is fair. Great. Oh, sure, you’re going to get NFL Head Coach with it, but who really wants that? It’s like Madden, but somebody takes the controller away from you when the game starts.

The most disturbing, however, is that you’ll need NFL Head Coach to be able to draw up your plays. Yes, if you don’t buy this inflated and ridiculous version of the game, you’ll no longer be able to draw up your own plays in Madden and use your own playbook. I’m tired of this crap, EA. Madden has been in a constant state of degeneration ever since 2005 (the last year NFL 2k was a competitor). Unless we see a HUGE leap forward in gameplay, I’m done with this series for good. After taking so much from gamers over the years, you’d think to celebrate 20 years of strong support from the gaming community that EA could give something back, rather than just screwing over their fan base once more. Guess not.